He Is Light
by LittleMissEighty-Sixed
Summary: Theodore Nott has always found himself the odd man out, the unlucky one, the unwanted one. When he finds his salvation in that of one Luna Lovegood, he feels he isn't worthy of her. But if there is one thing Luna can teach him, it is that ALL are worthy of light.


**He Is Light**

"What's wrong? Did something happen?" Luna asked softly. The door to their library was ajar, revealing a disheveled Theo sitting in their favourite spot, a seat below the window looking out into the forest beyond their property.

"It's nothing," he shook his head swiftly. The light from the full moon illuminated the room, his features whitewashed in the moonlight.

Pulling her cardigan tighter around her, Luna made her way over to the boy. The sounds of her feet pattering gently against the wooden floor caused himself internal turmoil.

Theo said nothing, he watched out of the corner of his eye as she climbed onto the seat beside him. Poking his legs tenderly she waited for him to move his legs. With an exaggerated sigh, he relented.

Smiling triumphantly at his surrender, Luna placed her legs on either side of his body, pulling his chest to hers as she buried her face in his shirt. He was warm, and when he placed his arms around her she felt the familiar tinge of safety. His body was playing out the familiar motion, but she knew something was wrong.

"What's going on in that head of yours, Lovegood?" Theo's chest rumbled with a forced laugh. _It didn't escape her._

"I am wondering what is wrong, _Theodore_ …" Luna sighed, raking her fingers through her wavy locks.

Theo could see the concern in her eyes, it made his heart clench. "It's noth-"

" **Theodore. Alexander. Nott** , if you say nothing is wrong one more time, I will leave this room and you will sleep on the couch tonight!" The sound of Luna's frustrations caused a flinch from Theo. Looking down at his girlfriend of two and a half years he tried to understand why he couldn't tell her how he felt.

 _He knew why._

He was vulnerable. He was weak. If he couldn't be strong for himself, how could he be strong for her?

"Is this about your father?" She asked.

He didn't respond. He didn't know how to.

Sighing quietly into his chest, she looked up at him, daring him to look away.

In the softest of voices, he heard her speak, "I wish you'd stop running from your problems and run to me instead…"

His heart had finally broken.

"I-its everyone…" Theo croaked. "It's not just my father, it's everyone. I am the son of a bloody Death Eater! It's not enough that I _didn't_ take the mark. I will forever be branded as a traitor because of my father's actions!" He choked back a sob as he tried to look anywhere but the girl who sat in his lap.

With sad eyes, Luna took his hand. Softly stroking the backs of his knuckles with her thumb as she brought them up to her lips.

"You are _not_ your father, you know this. I know this. That's all that matters, I don't care what any-"

Cutting her off, Theo spoke quickly, exhaling the sentence in one breath, "I see the way they look at you when we are together, the way they point and snicker, the things they whisper when we so much as hold hands. What kind of life is that Luna? It's not worth it, I'm not worth it!"

"No," shaking her head she felt tears well up, doing her best to hold them in she gave him a small smile.

Cupping his face with both her hands she made him look at her once more, "I love you, do you understand what that means?" She paused, waiting to see if he would say something, anything. He didn't. He just looked at her with sad eyes.

"It means that I am with you, through the good and the bad, No matter what. I _choose_ you, Theodore Nott, I choose you, I will _always_ choose you, every time"

Closing his eyes, Theo sought out the strength deep within him not to run. Not to push this beautiful girl away that was willing to risk everything for him. He was tired, he didn't want to lie anymore.

"I thought that I was dreaming… when you said you loved me the first time," his voice felt foreign to him, this was something he never planned on sharing, something he tried so hard to bury. But here she was, the object of his affections, his saviour, breaking down his barriers.

This time, Luna laughed. Leaning her forehead against his, wrapping her arms around the back of his neck she breathed in his scent, he smelled like home.

"I know others don't feel I deserve redemption. That is why they look at you the way they do and say the things they say," running his hands down her spine, he circled his thumb at the small of her back, grounding himself in that moment.

"You are my light, and I am not worthy of you," he allowed a small smile to quirk at the edges of his mouth.

Luna contemplated what he had just said for a moment, wondering how hard that was for him to admit to her. Before he could over analyze her silence, she leaned forward, peppering his lips with small, soft kisses, she smiled against his mouth.

"All are worthy of light, Theo. You of all people especially," at her words, at her acceptance, Theo finally broke down. Letting the sob he had been withholding escape him in waves. Clutching her body to his he let all of his fears and doubts pour out of him, allowing himself this one moment of vulnerability.

As soon as the tears had stopped he pulled back to look at her.

Luna examines his face, his eyes were puffy and lips were swollen, but he had the most beautiful look of peace that had ever graced his features. He was free.

"I love you," she whispered.

" _I know_ ," he sighed. " _But I love you more_ ,"


End file.
